Wednesday, June 29, 2005 

Regrets... yeah i have regrets

I remember high school graduation. I remember all the kids I graduated with having some plans. I had none. In all fairness I was emotionally about 15 years old. I had no direction at all. I had a girl friend that I had proposed to. The stupidity of 18 year olds knows no bounds.
I started at a trade school taking data processing. I did not study and mostly flirted with girls. I was still engaged. I shortly flunked out of trade school. I waited the year and went back to sign up again. The advisor told me I could not come back. That is as bad as it gets. He told me I could pursue another major. And suggested air conditioning repair. I said yes what else could I do. I made straight I made nothing but A’s. Mostly out of fear, if this did not work what would.
After the first success of my life I thought I might try a college. My fiancé was going to Livingston University. So I thought I would go there. I really did love this girl as much as a 20-year-old boy can. I was emotionally about 18 at this time, no where nearly old enough to know what marriage is about.

I was the life of the party at my local group of friends. I was invited to all parties. I was expected to do great things with my life. In retrospect I don’t know why. I did not have much going for me. I had no money; I only had a bubbly personality. I really did. Those of you that know me personally would not think that I could be an extrovert. But I was. What is odd is that in high school I was the introvert’s introvert. But that is another story.

Then my fiancé dumped me. I went into a great depression. I canceled my enrollment to Livingston University and enrolled at The University of Montevallo. I was enrolled in the summer session. I had to make good enough grades to prove that I should be there. I made a 4.0. I made it my mission to go out with as many girls as I could. I hesitated occasionally. Three come to mind.

A.M … A.M. was a beautiful girl I dated her for two years. I consider her the great failure of my life. She loved me dearly and I her. But there were fundamental differences that separated us. I broke her heart. I think of this often with much regret I could have handled it much better

AC….AC was one of the most fun people that I knew. We went out for 2 years as well. She broke my heart. She left me because I could not commit to her the way she needed. I was not ready to marry. I found this out years latter. I think of her often.

W.M …. This was one of my first girl friends in college. She was a sweet country girl who loved me too. I dated her briefly during my freshman year then saw her 5 years latter right before I left for good. She was beautiful and as I spoke to her and she offered to try again. I could not help but think that I could not put her through that again. I was not stable enough to give her what she wanted and new it.

Then I met my wife she was my wife from the first. I knew it as I know myself. I enjoyed college. I was not the best student. I had to work my butt off to pay for it. Often I skipped meals for days at a time to try to get by. Chuck often snuck me into the cafeteria so that I would not starve to death. When my finances would allow me to proceed no further I left college. The fact that I never finished is one of the single biggest regrets of my life. .

I dont know why i wrote this but here it is. no regrets there.


I am soo ashamed.
I forgot my camera again.
Go ahead and let me have it.
I admit it i deserve all the thorns and arrows thrust upon me.
I will try to bring it tomorrow. obviously though,, no promisses.


This is a pic of one of my chicks. I have named it Rusty Butt.
I believe that this one has a slight glandular problem.
It is large to keep in the coop.
I am mulling over the possiblity of using it to pull a plow.
I am going through 50 pounds of feed per day.
If anyone has any suggestions please let me know.
Chuck no you cannot use Rusty Butt for any of your sick sexual perversions.
Snagley out.

Tuesday, June 28, 2005 

I am sorry

I forgot my dang digital camera again.
I will do my best to remember it tomorrow.
Go ahead and slander me now.

Monday, June 27, 2005 

We survived the weekend

Well the weekend was a success.

The chickens came 4 were dead upon delivery. But the remaining 20 are fine. I have 4 roosters and 16 hens. Far more chickens that I originally wanted if 14 hens lay an egg per week then I would have to find something to do with 98 eggs per week. This means I have to scrap my hen house plans in favor of a larger structure. But they are cute. I took some pictures but forgot to bring my digital camera to work with me. They are all eating well and drinking well. The brooder is working well too. So far a success story. But time will tell.

The yuppies came to dinner yesterday. I grilled some hamburgers and hotdogs. The Men and kids were sent out in the yard while the women occupied the house. I don’t know how this always happens but it does. When I would walk in they would all look at me as if I was intruding, and the conversation would screech to a halt. They must have been talking about how handsome I am.

My boys played with the other kids and had a good time. One of the Dads there told my daughter if she swallowed a watermelon seed that a watermelon would grow out of her belly button. This caused a large degree of concern for her. She was still talking about it this morning.

My 5 year old boy and another 5 year old boy got into trouble they were licking their fingers and putting them in each others drink. My son does not mess with his food. He is an eating machine. He did not take this well and eventually it escalated into a hotdog-throwing melee.

One of the women has a son who is a baseball player trying for a college scholarship. He asked his mother if she thought he would do well in sports medicine as a college major. She said she just had to tell him that he was not smart enough to do handle that. I was shocked that a mother would tell her child he was not smart enough for something.
He graduated with honors from high school. If my kid wants to be a mathematician or whatever I am going to tell him to go for it.

Oh well chicken pics tomorrow.

BO Snagley signing out.

Friday, June 24, 2005 

Your IQ Is 125

Your Logical Intelligence is Genius
Your Verbal Intelligence is Exceptional
Your Mathematical Intelligence is Above Average
Your General Knowledge is Genius


Well the bills are pilling up.
We are having a bunch from my wife’s biopsy and oh I forgot to tell yall about the trip to the emergency room for my daughter.

My father wanted to water the grapes with plastic drums. I hated the idea because they are uglier that the underside of a boot, but he is an old man and I don’t protest too much usually. My double dufas brother got him some from somewhere. They were filled with sodium hydroxide at one time. They only had trace amounts when delivered to my home where they were left with my three kids and wife. The boys played the drums pretending they were horses. My 3-year-old daughter decided to try to inflate the drum so she put her mouth on the opening. Sodium hydroxide true to its nature burned her mouth and tongue.

My wife called poison control. They freaked and told her to hang up and call an ambulance, which she did. The paramedics showed up in about 10 minutes followed by the ambulance driven by a young maniac. They made the normally 45 minute drive to children’s hospital in 22 minutes in Birmingham’s rush hour traffic. I arrived before the ambulance from work. Long story short, she is fine some chemical burns but overall ok. Thank God. We disposed of the drums of poison, which my double dufas brother and father let my children play with. If she had ingested any it probably would have killed her or maimed her. So Papa Snagley was ticked, and acted accordingly, no one will bring poison to my house and leave it for my kids to play with.

Anyway, all these bills are piling up. We decided not to go on vacation this summer. Which is a bummer. We will do something in town I will still take off the time. Oh well, “Life comes along”…

On a side note the chickens are arriving today. So that is good. 24 Buff Orrington chicks. Pictures will be on the way.

Thursday, June 23, 2005 

A mad Snagley rant.

The supernova remnant N 63A is a member of N 63, a star-forming region in the Large Magellanic Cloud (LMC). Visible from the southern hemisphere, the LMC is an irregular galaxy lying 160,000 light-years from our own Milky Way galaxy. The LMC provides excellent examples of active star formation and supernova remnants, many of which have been studied with Hubble.

Can you believe that they are going to discontinue the Hubble telescope in favor of going back to the moon, and then to Mars? I think of this as a giant step backwards.
We will spend an extraordinary amount of money sending someone to the moon. And it is true that we will make many technological breakthroughs doing so but, jeeze Louise it would be nice to use that money for something that the everyday person could benefit from quickly and directly. Like feeding some people, and paying some of this national debt that we are leaving or our children and grandchildren to have to sacrifice to pay for. Or we could spend it to invent a gasless vehicles so we can become less dependent on the Middle East for oil and then we could leave them to their own devices and not be concerned the next time they start killing each other.

I am in favor of going to the moon and to mars, those of you that know me know that I love astronomy and B.S. like that. But lets spend our money on getting things into shape before we go and spend more money on frivolous stuff. In my family we will not buy a Lotus until we have the house paid for, and I do want a lotus. But when we can afford it without sacrificing my children’s future I will buy a snazzy sports car, or by then I may want something else, but my point is lets get earth squared away before worrying about the dang moon.

Wednesday, June 22, 2005 

as good as it gets

After yesterdays post I felt a little guilty about abusing my yuppie friends. They are good people they just have different ideas about what makes life worth living. I thought about what I truly enjoy. What I want to remember about this part of my live this age of 30 something. I am starting to feel mortal which is a pain in the butt. But I know that the simple pleasures in life are what I want to remember.

I remember 4 years ago on a Christmas morning. I was with my wife’s family. We spend it in the country at her grandparent’s house. We were opening presents everyone was laughing and loving each other. And my father in law stopped us for a second. He said I want yall to think about something for a second, I want you to realize that this is as good as it gets. We were all together healthy and happy. That was a pivotal moment in my life.
That was the moment that i got it.

My wife’s great grandmother died this year at 100, she was living large to the end. Her grandmother has developed cancer and there is no hope. But I have the memory of what it is like to be as good as it gets. This year it will be as good as it gets again. Even if we are a little sad I plan on loving everyone with all I have. It is the simple pleasures that make it as good as it gets.

Simple Pleasures

1. Coffee in the morning in my workshop with my sons.
2. Digging worms with my daughter. And hearing her squeal
3. Seeing my 85-year-old father working in the garden.
4. Watching my 80-year-old mother walking for exercise with my wife and hearing them talk and laugh.
5. Watching my sons climb the same trees that I climbed as a boy.
6. Sleeping with the windows open while it rains and hearing the rain fall on the oak and pecan trees.
7. Catching fire flies with my kids
8. Slapping the wife on the butt and calling her baby. (I know it keeps coming up but what can I say I like it)
9. Seeing my kids play
10. Homes schooling the kids.

Tuesday, June 21, 2005 

I have ordered chickens. 24 buff Orrington chicks. They will be in Thursday but I will have to have them delivered from Selma Alabama, home of the Edward T Pettis Bridge.
I am having some folks over to the house Sunday they will eat my food and comment on my place. They are all “city yuppies”. They comment on my kids tire swings and the ropes that they climb and then they will look at the garden and fruit trees and my kids beagle Patsey. I can tell all the while they are thinking what a bunch of red necks, maybe one day those Snagleys can move into town and live like the rest of us slubs.

But, I like living where I do. I love having a garden, chickens, and living as I do. I would not trade my kids swings and ropes for anything in the world. And I would not live in “town” unless forced by conditions beyond my control. So I will feed the yuppies my food. “Probably feed them deer burgers and not tell them” and take all the advice on how to improve myself. And when they leave I will feed my chickens, water the garden, hug my kids, slap my wife on the butt and call her baby, and sleep soundly and satisfied.
Snagleys rule

Monday, June 20, 2005 

Send winnings to the Snagley Fund

As you know I took a bet to hop naked on a pogo stick through a feminist picnic with MEN RULE tattooed to my hind parts.
Well I could not get the tattoo on such short notice. So I used paint. During several trial runs in my back yard I discovered that it is quite painful to hop naked on a pogo stick. I am used to more support in certain areas. However a bet is a bet.
I went down town, and as it happens not only was there a feminist picnic but also the music festival City Stages was this weekend.

As I prepared for this task I was quick to insure that Chuck was not around with a camera. I made it half way through the picnic when I was pelted with potato salad. I sped up my hopping and was tackled by several militant feminists. I was tied up; my hind parts suffered a severe scrubbing. I was released several hours latter with the words “Women First” written in sharpie on my rear. Needless to say it was quite embarrassing.

Unfortunately my pogo stick was bent into the shape of a pretzel and wrapped around my neck. I was afforded the luxury of an athletic supporter, although I am a little uncertain where it came from. I was released quite a way from my pickup truck next to a biker’s bar. A kind fellow named Roadrash gave me some assistance and I was on my way home.

Anyway, a fund has been set up in the name of Snagley at any Merchants and Planters bank. You may send my winnings to this fund.

Thanks. Bonaparte Oliver Snagley

Friday, June 17, 2005 

plans for the weekend

Weekend plans.

Well as you know my old buddy Stinky, I mean chuck, bailed on the fishing trip. He said something about another back waxing or something like that. So I have to come up with some other plans. I could

1. Go fishing anyway. (Fishing by myself is boring. But I have not ruled it out)
2. Buy some chickens (I cannot fine a place that sells locally)
3. Work in the garden (After 14 inches of rain in two weeks the grass is knee high in the garden. So I need to do that)
4. Go buy some new athletic shoes. (My old ones are worn out sort of like me)
5. Dig a big hold and bury my feet. (It limits my mobility for those quick moves I am known for)
6. Slap my wife on the butt and call her baby. (That is in the plans anyway)
7. Rent a movie (lame… nothing I want to see)
8. Buy some arrows and shoot targets all weekend. (Distinct possibility)
9. Climb into a tall tree and pee off the top (well that’s got to be in my plans)
10. Hop naked on a pogo stick through the feminist picnic down town with “Men rule” tattooed to my hind parts. (Nah could lead to more trouble that I want)

Oh well I guess I will think of something. If you hear of anything let me know.

Thursday, June 16, 2005 

The epic closes. or the allligator III

Luther led Chuck and I up to a shack near the North garden. There was marijuana planted in the field. There were two toothless women in their late 40s sitting on the swing smoking more of those hand rolled cigarettes. One of the women looked at us and said “Luther it is about time”.

Chuck looked at the marijuana pile on the porch for a minute. Then he looked at me. Then he looked at the women on the porch. Then he took one more look at the Alligator walking into the distance. He then striped down to his underwear “which used to be white” And started rolling himself a cigarette. He looked up at me and said. “Mr. Snagley I think I am home”.

One of the women stood up. She was wearing a pair of cut off bib overalls. They were stained from top to bottom with what looked like tobacco spit. She ground out her cigarette in the palm of her hand and said “Luther looks like we got an addition to the family. I want this one.” Pointing to Chuck. The other woman stood up. She was wearing matching overalls. She started walking toward me. “I said whoa now I am a married man you know”. She stopped and said to Luther. Damn I guess I will have to share this one with Myrtle” pointing to Chuck.

I had to think of something quick I had no intention of staying at this place with Myrtle and her sister, Luther, the Alligator and the newest member of their family, Chuck.

Myrtle said, “Eunice this one is mine. Why don’t you get us some grub while I warm this one up”.
Myrtle said “ All right but we are out of grub all we got left is some cottage cheese and a bottle of milk”.
“There may be hope after all I thought”

I sat there on the ground with Luther pointing a shotgun at me while Chuck gorged himself on cottage cheese. He then downed the quart of milk.
When he had finished eating Eunice said to Myrtle “We are going to have to share this one. Pa can use the other one to work the fields or something”. She took Chuck by the ear and led him into the shack. Luther started laughing. Your friend is about to make those to darlings’ day. He then went into the shack to watch what was happening.
From outside the shack I could hear some commotion. It sounded like a panther was loose in the shack. Then I heard the sound that could only be described as Chuck exploding, followed by the sounds of choking, gasping and wheezing. I knew then that the lactose intolerance had done its job. The three mutants came running out of the shack and did not stop till the got to the river where they dove into the muddy water trying to clear their eyes. Chuck then came out of the shack grinning like a fool. He was smoking another “home made” cigarette and said. I had it planned all along. No one can stand up to Chuck farts.

We then jumped into the Alligators truck and beat it out of there.
This is the real story of the Alligator. Any other story is simply hogwash.
On the way home Chuck loaded his lip with snuff, still wearing only his stained underwear and said. Hey when are we going fishing again.

Wednesday, June 15, 2005 

The aligator II

Ok let me pick up where I left off.
Chuck had just eaten my lunch spit Oreos into his beer told me his sad story and fallen out of the boat.

As you all must know. Chuck cannot swim he is afraid of water. That is why he does not regularly bath or shower. He was floundering in the water, inconsiderately ruining any fishing to be found in this fishing spot. I got a Pepsi and settled back to watch the show.
He was screaming for help and crying. I looked at him and told him to stand up. He did stand up. The water came up only to his hips.

He looked at me and started yelling profanity at me blaming me for all the ills of society, and alleging that my parents were of questionable decent. I told him to get back in the boat and stop scaring the fish. He stood there for a moment and started laughing. He had the oddest look on his face. I have learned that whenever Chucks looks odder that usually it is not a good sign. I steadied myself for whatever disaster was impending. He then passed gas, and asked for his beer. I handed him the beer, gasping for breath. He drained the quart bottle of beer and reached for the boat attempting to get into the boat, promptly capsizing the craft spilling all of the valuable contents, namely me.

I surfaced the water just in time to see the boat drifting down the river away from us and too far for me to reach it swimming. I then heard the ominous sound of a pump shotgun being loaded, and an unfamiliar voice saying. Gator, look what I found. I turned to see a man; I assumed it was a man. He appeared to be in his 40s over 6 feet tall bald, and naked except for a pair of what used to be white underwear, he was covered from head to toe in mud and filth, he could have been a linebacker for any pro football team. He was holding a shotgun and smoking what I thought was a hand rolled cigarette.

Gator came over he a short fat man wearing bib overalls, no shirt, and no shoes. The side buttons were open on his overalls putting his lard gut on display. He, unlike his companion, had long gray hair tied in a ponytail behind his large bulbous head. He said boys, dont move, dont breath, I aint killed anyone all day and I am due. He then said Damn what is that smell. Are you boys with the D.E.A., be honest it may be your last chance to be honest in this life.

Chuck started to cry wailing about not wanting to die, he then farted churning the water and causing my eyes to water. I said no mister(gasp) we are not with the DEA (wretch) were doing some fishing(barf), and stinky here turned over our boat. That is it floating around the bend. If you would be so kind as to help us get it you will have seen the last of us. I need to be getting home soon anyway.

He said, boys I am a fisherman too, I don’t practice no catch and release. The two of you are what I call keepers. He turns to the man in his drawers and said, Luther take these up to the north garden. We’ll see we can find any use for them.

Chuck turned to me and said “Snagley you idiot what are we going to do”.
I said, Chuck shut up and do whatever you can to not tick these guys off.

The older man said Snagley and Chuck huh. My name is Mordicai but everyone calls me the Aligator. This is Luther, he used to be a fisherman too, now he guards the crop.
To be continued.

Tuesday, June 14, 2005 

The true aligator story

Chuck and Snagley go fishing

As you know Chuck has started a story regarding the alligator incident. As usual he tends to confuse many issues. I have decided to post a companion article clearing up some of the confusion. It begins thusly.

Chuck called my up crying again. He is divorcing his wife. He needs to talk to someone and I volunteer. I suggest a fishing trip. I go to pick him up at his house. The day proceeds thusly…

Me: Hi Chuck

Chuck: Hello Mr. Snagley

Me: You are not going fishing with me wearing that. (He is wearing a pair of tennis shorts and a hat with an umbrella built in, and no shirt.) Go inside and come out dressed like a man.
10 minutes pass
He returns shortly wearing blue jeans and a pink polo shirt.
5 minutes pass
He returns shortly wearing blue jeans and a Charles in charge t-shirt.
5 minutes pass
He returns shortly wearing blue jeans and a plain white t-shirt.

Me: ok lets go.

I take him to the Alabama River near Selma, Alabama. He blubbers the entire way. He is dipping Copenhagen snuff. Chucks reaches into his hip pocket and gets his can as he taps the can on my dashboard denting the wood he says.
I ain’t been fishing in years.
He then runs his hand down the back of his pants scratching some unnatural itch. He then dips ¼ can of Copenhagen snuff with the same hand, loading his lip way beyond capacity. He is spitting the tobacco juice into an empty Zima bottle.

He usually disgusts me. But for some reason I feel too sorry for him to blast him about his unhygienic ways.
Chuck is passing gas as normal. He is lactose intolerant. But he loves to eat cottage cheese you can see some cottage cheese on the stubble of beard from his breakfast this morning. His condition produces an aroma that would give a buzzard the dry heaves

As I roll down the window in an attempt to stay lucid behind the wheel I say.
Chuck (gag gag) it is all going to work out (wretch). FA will foul something up. She always does (wheeze) and you will come out of this thing smelling like a dead rat. (Which will be a great improvement).

We finally arrive at the river. We stop at my favorite bait shop to rent a boat. As usual Chuck brought no cash. I pay for his fishing license and get us both a sack lunch. I rent the boat and prepare to go fishing.
Chuck starts begging for beer. I get him two quart bottles of his favorite beer
“Milwaukee’s best” and we shove off.
Chuck eats my lunch while I am navigating down river to the first fishing hole. I ask him how his children are handling all this. He spits Oreo cookies into his beer as he explains the latest insanity that they are all being subjected too.
Then ,as usual, he falls out of the boat.

To be continued.

Friday, June 10, 2005 

Snagley needs a vacation

The top ten signs you need a vacation

1. Your skin is so pale that you are easily mistaken for a zombie
2. You liken of being sick in bed as a trip to a spa.
3. You start singing Jimmy Buffet songs out loud at work.
4. You just made a customer service rep at cry.
5. You think of a visit from relatives as a curse on your head.
6. Merlot just ain’t cutting the mustard anymore.
7. You have a chicken coup, chicken brooder, feeder and water setup and no chickens.
8. Your kids don’t think there really is an ocean.
9. You ask the doctor if you can put Mrs Dash salt substitute on your margarita glass.
10. Your last name is Snagley

Wednesday, June 08, 2005 

another day another quarter

My brother is coming for a surprise visit this weekend.
He is bringing his mother in law, which seems odd to me
He is 18 years older than I am. He is the most anal retentive person I have ever met.
I really like his wife. I lived with them for a couple of months once. They are staying from Saturday through Tuesday.
On another note, my oldest brother is finding me some baby chick. I have been holding out for Buff Orrington. They have not been easy to find. I know none of you know what I am talking about but I am about half sick today and material is suffering.
For those of you wondering about the upcoming Chuck, Snagley fishing outing, we are going to a small lake and renting a boat. We will try for some bream and maybe some crappie. Chuck will, in all likely hood, fall out of the boat. I am anxious to see how he does. He is not know for his outdoor acumen.
I got nothing funny for today’s post so lets do another ask Snagley.
I will answer your questions. If you have any.
Snagley out

Tuesday, June 07, 2005 

I keep seeing this thingamadoodle on blogs so i gave in to peer pressure and here it is

1. Crowd >Trees
2. Hamburger> vidalia onion
3. choker> Heimlick Manuver
4. lights >186,000 miles per second
5. tinsel> fly tying material
6. testament> Hermanutics
7. best part of the day >Foldgers
8. election> Predestination
9. clarinet> band
10. dead sea> Mrs Dash salt substitute

Monday, June 06, 2005 



Chuck has this post about music the other day and it got me thinking.
I don’t listen to music. I can’t think when it is playing, it clutters my thoughts.
I don’t listen to it on a daily or even weekly basis. When I do I like to listen to Jazz. Old jazz. Mostly instrumental
But in my past I was known to listen music even music at high decibel levels.
So here are my top 10 songs that I have liked in my life. I will try to not be too obscure

1. Happy birthday (Mom and Dad) My parents have sung this song to me every birthday I have had. It is always good news to hear this one. And at the end I like to throw in the old “your growing old” for sarcasms sake.
2. Blue Moon. (Billy Holliday) Another old song I like that mellow tone that the old time blues singers achieved. It is not really a blues song in the classical sense of blues, sort of cabaret. You expect to see a woman on a piano in a low cut dress.
3. I got my Mo Jo working (Clarence Gatemouth Brown) I was in New Orleans in a jazz club one time with my ex brother in law. We were having a Heineken when he looked over and said “hey that’s Gatemouth Brown. Dang if it wasn’t I bought him a Heineken and he sang this song.
4. Snow Blind Friend (Stephenwolf) This is about a guy who overdoses on drugs. I heard it the first time after a friend had the same problem.
5. Bason Street Blues. (3 drunks) that is the actual name of the Dixie land jazz band I like Dixie land jazz. This is a good one.
6. Pretty Woman (Van Halen) Great intro
7. The George Thorogood anthology
8. Songs you know by heart (Jimmy Buffett) the entire cd
9. Crazy (Patsy Cline) When I hear this one I want to get drunk and cry in my soup
10.Jesus loves me (Me) I have to sing it to my middle boy every night or he wont go to sleep

Friday, June 03, 2005 

A Snagley work history

Snagleys Jobs

1. Age 14 Loading Hay
2. Age 15 Cleaning the high school cafeteria
3. Age 16-17 farm hand on soy bean farm
4. Age 17 off season Chic-fil-A
5. Age 18 Plumbers helper
6. Age 19 Air conditioning mechanic helper
7. Age 20 Pipe crew laying water main
8. Age 21 Stable cleaning at horse farm
9. Age 22 Back to Pipe Crew different company
10. Age 23-24 Pool cleaner at Holiday in at beach
11. Age 25-29 Air conditioning Mechanic
12. Age 30 Construction superintendent
13. Age 31- Customer support/Installation manager at a software company

Ok some detail
I enjoyed hauling hay. It was in the outdoors in the sun. I got paid per bale of hay loaded.

I could go at my own pace as long as rain was not in the forecast

I hated cleaning the cafeteria. Lunch room ladies are nuts

I loved working on the farm. 16 hour days but I loved being outside in the sun.

Chick-fil-A was an awful job typical fast food job. Boss made a ton of money I made minimum wage. I was used to real work so I outworked everyone there.

Plumbers helper Glorified ditch digger did learn about plumbing code and pipe fitting.

Air conditioning helper got a trade school degree and did this for a while. Was good at it.

Pipe crew I worked with the armpits of society. These guys lived out of their cars. Daily they would drive their cars one mile forward and lay water mains to their cars when they got to them they would drive into town buy a case of beer and a bucket of chicken then drive back to the job site eat the chicken drink all of the beer fall asleep and urinate all over themselves then without showering go back to work the next day. One guy did this for over a month until the job boss made him bathe.

I started college and needed money for food so I got a job cleaning out the stable at a horse ranch. There I gained money for school and a deep and intense hatred for horses.

Back to pipe crew. Construction pays more money than shoveling horse poop.

Pool cleaner at the holiday in at the beach. Summer job. Sweet. Went in at 5:00 was off at 1:00 .Snagley was free on the beach till 5:00 Oh Yeah.

Air conditioning Mechanic. After I left college because of a lack of money I went back to being an air conditioning mechanic I averaged 67 hours per week the most I worked was 103 in hours one week. One-week vacation per year

Construction superintendent. I worked at this for one year worked 6 16 hour days per week but they did give me Sundays off. No vacation no holidays.

Present Customer support manager at a software company. I knew those days in the computer lab would pay off. Ha Ha ain’t life a kick in the pants. Best job I have ever had I even enjoy it. Moved from flunky to management been here 7 years no plans to leave.

Thursday, June 02, 2005 

What I would change about this world

What I would change about this world

1. No more hungry people. (I have been truly hungry so this one is personal) In our society there is no need for anyone to be hungry. But in other parts of the world there are people starving. They are starving because of political reasons. It is not a republican or democrat issue they were starving through the past 4 presidents and countless congresses. The fact of the matter is we don’t really care.
2. Child abuse. There is no justifiable reason to abuse a child in any form. There are selfish idiots who think that is should be allowable to introduce children to sex with adults at an early age even pre pubescent. Let the kids be innocent for a while. If I had my way, and luckily I don’t, it would be punishable by death. (This one is personal too)
3. Jimmy Buffet would be declared ambassador to the North Korea. Jimmy could mellow out anyone. Even nuke crazy dictators. He could have them humming Margaretville inside of one year. And I would bet that they would make the North Korean national anthem (Why don’t we get drunk and screw). I can just picture it being played at the next Olympics.
4. I would make the American idol format, the format for the next presidential election. Simon will have a field day with that one. Only no Paula Abdul, we can substitute Carmen Sandiego where is the world is she anyway?
5. Everyone should have to work in a factory, and on a farm picking produce for two weeks. Most people have no idea what hard labor feels like. And what some people have to do in order to keep their families afloat.
6. I would declare war on fire ants. Actually they are doing that now in the south. Fire ants are an invasive species, they are introducing some mite to counties in Alabama that kill fire ants then die. It’s about time.
7. Make North Carolinians ask before ruining my barbeque sandwich by putting a scoop of coleslaw on it. Jeeze Louise, if you did this in Alabama they would escort you to the state line with “long live barbeque” tattooed to your backside.
8. Declare a 50-mile strip of beach a national park and forbid anyone from building anything on it. But encourage people to visit and enjoy what a virgin beach used to be.
9. Develop a safe cigarette. One that taste good and wont kill you.