SNAGLEY snagley SNAGLEY or (TRI SNAG)

I am at work today on Saturday the end of the month. I am the only one here. The phone is not ringing as I expected it not to. So I thought I would post.
I went to a party last night, a precursor to my 20-year high school reunion. I did not want to go. But they called me at the party wanting to know why I was not there. Unfortunately the party was two houses down from mine about half a mile so I had no excuse.
Let me also add that I hated high school. I was so immature and naive that it was absolutely drudgery for me to go every day. My wife loved her school experience I hated mine. I had sworn that I would never see these people again. They thoughts of them still dredge up bad memories. I went anyway. People change in 20 years and everyone was polite. I know that they do not even know what pain they caused me. They may not even have caused the pain it might have been mostly my own insecurities. I don’t know if I will go to the reunion tonight, I will have to wait and see how I feel later today.
Its funny I guess I expected all these people pushing forty to run around like they did 20 years ago.
There were a few girls who looked identical to the way they did then. One even had the same hairstyle. I wonder what they think of me. Oh well I will have to wait and see.

How many times did it take you to get your drivers license.
It only took me once. I remember it as if it were yesterday.
I was 15 years old looking forward to the day I would be able to tool around in the family car. I had studied the book for the manual test for weeks. I had practically memorized it. I had practiced parallel parking and the dreaded and feared three-point turnabout until my parents started complaining about the price of gas. I was ready.

I went to the local DMV office. In the small town that I live in, a man named Ralph ran the testing portion of the DMV. My Mom drove me up to the office and let me out. I walked the long hall to Ralph’s office. I saw his cowboy boots propped up on the desk. As I arrived I realized he was reading the newspaper and smoking a pipe. He had a large glass of iced tea sitting on his belly; there was an osculating fan on his desk blowing directly onto him. I had not met him before and Jabba the Hut came to mind.
I said Sir I am here for my driving test. He said, “Damn boy what else would you be here for”. This was not a good sign.
Without speaking he handed me a test booklet and pointed at a table and chair in the corner. I spent 30 minutes using perfect penmanship (which is a task for me) to fill out the test. I am sure that I did not miss any questions. I walked up to him and handed him the test. He glanced at it briefly and said, “Damn fine job boy you passed”.
Then he said, well I guess that you will be needing the road test now. He heaved himself up and grabbed a set of car keys off the wall, pulled a bandana out of his hip pocket and mopped the sweat off of his face. He turned around half way down the hall and said to me “aw hell boy you can drive” he then took my picture handed me a temporary license and told me to stay out of trouble.
I then went out and showed it to my mother. I told her to scoot over and I will drive.
When she got through laughing I knew that my prospects for tooling around in the family ride were about the same as me floating in the air like a red balloon, but my first car is a story for another day.

I have a friend who has 2 boys. They are roughly the same age as my two boys.
They come over occasionally to play. It is obvious that their parents don’t think that we are quite as good as they are.

I am not a poor person. I have to live within my means as most people do.
I am not a yuppie. I aspire to live on a farm. I want my kids to know what it feels like to do an honest days labor. I don’t want them doing it for a living but non-the less I want them to know what it is like to do honest labor.

These morons told me that I was being mean to my kids because I make my oldest Son, who is seven, earn money to purchase his game boy games. I have him do chores around the house and yard for quarters or 50 cents and it takes him weeks to earn the money. A game boy game cost around 15 dollars. He looks forward to earning enough money; he counts it every night and keeps it in a special wallet that I gave him. He thinks of jobs to do around the house, which is a huge help to my wife. They told me that no child should have to work for life’s simple pleasures. This angered me.

I told them that it was my goal that when I turn this child loose upon the world that he be able to pay his own way, as his father has. I further told them that I will help this child any way I can including give up my life in his protection, but I will not raise my son to believe that he is entitled to any free rides due to the fact that he was born. Hell, it is not like a game boy game is a life necessity. I don’t even consider it one of life’s simple pleasures. I don’t charge him to climb a tree, even though I provided him at no charge the rope he uses to climb it. I don’t charge him to cover himself with mud and pretend he is a space alien.

I told my son that if he wants to he can earn the 15.00 dollars for a game and if he wants he could instead of buying a game spend it on a baby goat. This goat could be raised and sold for 85 dollars. The conversation went like this

Me: what could a boy your age do with 85.00
Boy I could buy lots of games
Me or you could buy 5 goats and in 7 months sell them for 85 dollars and make 425.00… what could a boy your age do with 425.00

A light went off in his head I could see it clear as day.

Boy how many goats could I buy for 425 Daddy?
Me 28 goats.
Boy if I raised them for 7 months how much would that be Daddy
Me I had to get my calculator for this one but 2380.00
Boy and if I bought goats with that and sold them how much would that be Daddy
Me 13486.00… What could a young man your age do with thirteen and a half thousand dollars?

Boy Buy some more goats and a really cool game boy game.

Mean my ass.

I feel sorry for their child, and other like him, who will one day have to compete in the workplace with my child.
assuming he chooses enter the workplace.

85.00 is a very conserviative estimate 120.00 is more accurate

Let me first hammer out some details
bear in mind there is not enough room on any blog to put all of these details.
1. I am called by my aunt who is in her mid 60s, she tells me that my cousin Erwin is dead gives me some details, and asks me to make the trip to identify and retrieve him.
2. I agree. Plane tickets are arranged as I specified in the first post they are presumably paid by the government agency that Erwin works for.
3. I am the only logical choice. I have a valid passport and all my shots are current. I have some skill finding my way in other cultures.
4. Erwin and I have a history of being playing heinous practical jokes on one another. For instance when he left 2 ½ years ago I slipped a water gun that looked like a real pistol into his carry on bag causing him much conflict going through security. This was retaliation for him slipping into my yard one night and putting a “I love Ricky Martin” bumper sticker on my car.
5. I fly out on Saturday morning at 3:15 and fly for 11 hours then sleep in a nasty airport then fly again Tuesday morning to the island. I arrive at the island before daylight.
6. I was told that Erwin’s only companionship was French speaking bird watchers and military, but another American, who introduced himself as Mike, Erwin’s friend working at the weather station, meets me as I get off of the deathtrap “plane”.
7. I have flown or traveled for 76 hours with no bath no real food. No water only nasty hot soft drinks. I was strip searched before I got onto the “plane” to the island. I have not experienced air conditioning since I got off the plane from the states. And I have lost my luggage except for my carry on bag. I stink.
8. Mike asks if I want to go to my room, as no one will be able to help me till the next day “Wednesday”. And I can sleep and wash up.
9. I go to my room, which I am told is Erwin’s old room. It has a sink, no toilet. Mike leaves me there and says he will check on me around noon. It is a little after 5 in the morning.
10. I sort of sleep.
11. All this time I try to keep in mind that Erwin is dead. That his mother is grieving. I am a good Nephew to Aunt Doris. And that I am still going to have to look at my dead cousin who jumped off of a radio tower, and identify him.
12. Mike wakes me up. And we eat lunch. Cheese sandwiches.
13. I meet with some French dude who can barely speak English. He tells how he regrets this unfortunate happening and all the usual stuff. Then tells me as soon as I identify Erwin they will arrange for us to go home.
14. I am led to a building that resembles a storehouse by the edge of a dock. There are several boats nearby. Inside is what is obviously a walk in freezer. The entire place stinks like fish.
15. They tell me Erwin is in there, and Mike says that Erwin is inside of a body bag and that he unwrapped him to make this as easy as possible on me.
16. I go in I see Erwin. He is white with white hair and frost all over him. I start to feel really emotional and tears well up in my eyes.
17. Erwin sits up and starts to laugh at me. He ain’t dead, he planned this entire thing. He even used his annual travel allotment for the plane tickets that got me here.
18. I literally fall down scared spitless. Then I start getting mad.
19. When I calm down enough to be spoken to. Erwin tells me that his mother and all of my family were in on the joke.

I then spend a day with him laughing at me before I can fly home.
Now that I am back I am starting to realize that this was a great joke.
But I am still ticked off at everyone letting me go through all of this pain in my butt.
I think this is one of those great jokes that people never really expect anyone to fall for.
But he hit on my soft spots, old women, and family.
Aunt Doris met me at the airport in Birmingham, laughing at me too.
But she at least apologized for all the grief and told me she appreciated that I actually was doing her a favor.
But I am still out a week of vacation time that I cannot get back.I am not sure that I can top this one either.

I recently saw this couple... they were standing on the side of the road picking up cigarette butts. beware of them they are a rough crowd

I come from and old family.
My cousin Janie died this last week she was 110.
She is second from the right.
Now I know that i have been known to spin a tale or two but this is real.
The woman was one hundred and ten years old.
she was my grandmothers first cousin. They loved each other very much.
My grandmother died whenI was 13. Thats her on the far left. she lived with us in the apartment where my parents live now. she was the only grandparent i ever knew.
this is profoundly sad for me to know that that era is now gone.
one of the women in this picture is still living. she is 90.
First on the far right
She is the daughter of my cousin who was 110.
She told me she does not know what to do with the rest of her life she dedicated the last 35 years to taking care of her mother.
this is not a sad post. If you live to be 110 you have to expect to die. no one lives forever.
Lots of memories.
Snagley out.

Well I am back. A little older and a whole lot more cynical. To say the least it was a difficult week. After all of these flights to third world airports, under the guise of helping family I found myself the subject of a heinous practical joke. I am not over it enough to blog about it yet. I want to think about it a little longer and put my thoughts together. I am glad to be home. If I can get over the chronic irritability I will be ok.
I am posting a picture of the chickens.
More latter….

Well folks I will be gone for a week.
My cousin Erwin graduated college last fall a year ago. The government paid his tuition; he studied meteorology, the deal was that when he graduated he owed the government 5 years of service. He was stationed on Juan De Nova Island manning a weather station. The only occupants of the Island were him and a French guy that had been there for 3 years studying birds, and a small number of French military.
Erwin spent his days playing solitaire on a 386 computer with 4 Meg of ram. Erwin evidently could not take the pain of isolation and the companionship of someone who did not speak his language and jumped off of the weather stations radio antennae to his death. Due to the fact that the island technically under French rule a family member has to identify the body and accompany the remains back to the US. So I have been asked by his mother to make the trek. As I understand it he has been placed in a walk in freezer that the French use to store supplies and frozen fish bait.
So I have to fly to Madagascar, then hopefully charter a plane to the island, identify my frozen cousin, then fly across the Mozambique Channel to Mozambique, then fly back to the US with Erwin in tow, should be fun.

Hello cubs Mr. Tiddle said. “Anyone for a dip in the creek before supper”. We all said no thank you. Common sense and home training were prevailing.
He then yelled to Attila and Adolph “what about you two scouts. Don’t you want to be an example to these Cubs”?
Adolph and Attila said “Well sure we would, but we did not bring our swimsuits”.
Mr. Tiddle replied “Me neither boys haven’t you ever heard of skinny dipping”.
Adolph and Attila whined, “Sounds great Mr. Tiddle.
Mr. Tiddle said “I’ll meet you at the creek. The ice is thin and I found a place we can push it aside and swim to the other side. Cubs are you sure you wont join us, it will grow hair on your chest”.
“It would grow hair all over me” Luther muttered. The rest of us cubs all agreed that we had all of the hair that we could stand at the moment. Any more hair at this point in our lives would just be showing off.

Mr. Tiddle disappeared with a small towel thrown over his shoulder. Soon Attila and Adolph whimpered after him toward the creek.

Luther looked happier than I had ever seen him. I knew this was bad. Whenever he was really happy it meant that some tragedy was soon to befall us. Luther said this is as good as it gets. I will wait for a few minutes and then sneak down and get Attila and Adolph’s clothes and our revenge will begin.
I said “Luther I don’t know about this we have to sleep here tonight and they will look to us first”. He was not to be deterred. And after a few minutes off he went.

After he left Ms. Long appeared with another of the Moms Mrs. Lackey. Ms. Long asked, “where is Mr. Tiddle” I said “he is off swimming in the creek”. Ms. Long said, “Oh that man. We agreed as if we knew what she was talking about. We then set them up with some marshmallows and they taught us some songs they learned as girl scouts at Mt Snagley. It was turning into a nice night it was cold but the fire was warm. The sky was clear and the smoke and sparks drifted nicely up into the night sky. We drank hot chocolate and listened to the night.

Then Luther came back.
“I was only able to get one set of clothes,” he said. I stuffed them in their tent. I hope it is Attila’s. He then looked up at the ladies, surprised, and said “hi mom” and gave her the hug she was expecting. She said “Loothar I trust you were not up to any mischief”. Luther did his best-embarrassed look and said Kind of personal mom. The ladies laughed shyly. Then Luther and I waited to see who it was Attila or Adolph.

Attila dashed into camp to warm by the fire. He was fully clothed. “Boys, you did the right thing. I stuck my toe in the water and it is still numb.”

“Ok” Luther said “it is Adolph then. This should be good”.
Adolph came into camp next. “That water is colder that a well diggers hind end” Adolph said. If I had gone into that water I would have frozen my… well hello their Ms. Long, Mrs. Lackey nice to see you this evening. Adolph was fully dressed as well.

Luther looked grim. “I was afraid something like this might happen. You can have my bike.

Then a monster roared into camp. I for a moment thought it was a Sasquatch, but it was Mr. Tiddle. He was naked except for a small cedar branch he had broken off of a tree as a concession to modesty. Luther and were too afraid to hide. Then an odd thing happened he grabbed Attila and Luther. As I thought he said dry as a bone. So boys the old steal the clothes trick well you picked the wrong man to play that one on.
“It wasn’t us Mr. Tiddle we swear,” begged Attila and Adolph
“We’ll see about that lets look in your tent and see if we don’t find my clothes,” said Mr. Tiddle.
“Ok great idea,” said Adolph.
“Yeah lets,” said Attila.
OH NO they screamed as they looked into the tent.
Mr. Tiddle grabbed both of then by the back of the neck and said, “Well we shall see how you boys like a dip in the creek”. And he headed to the creek with both of them in tow.

The screams were some of the best sustained and defiantly the most satisfying of my life. I particularly enjoyed the way they warbled the moment before total submersion.

Mr. Tiddle came back to the campfire. He recovered his cedar bough. His blue legs looked comical poking out covered with goose bumps, and shall we say there was significant shrinkage.
“Boys, ladies please excuse my nudity for a moment. But I need to make a point. People can play their little practical jokes but in the end they have to pay the pipe”. LADIES!!!!! He then crouched over into what could only be described as a standing fetal position. About that time a spark from the fire ignited his bough, which was not doing all that much for his nudity anyway. Made a mad dash to the tent to get some clothes. I would have sworn I heard him say a bad word then but as a scoutmaster he would not have don’t something like that.

Luther and I went home with Ms. Long that evening. Both of us decided we liked camping. But we also decided that cub scout camping could not get any better that he had that night. We both quit the cubs and waited for the day we too could become full-fledged boy scouts.

I was a miserable cub scout. By that I mean that I was bored to tears with the weekly meeting. I did not want to make paper airplanes, eat cookies and drink cool-aid. I wanted to go camping. I told this to the Den Mother Ms. Long. She said she would look into it. She finally talked Henry Lackey, one of the Dads, into taking us camping. As fate would have it, He managed to scrape together some out of town business at the last minute and escaped his duty as camp leader. Mrs. Long said she would be unable to take us camping and we would have to wait until one of our fathers would be able to take us on an outing.
I knew it would be months before one of the mothers would be able to browbeat her husband into taking the Cub Scouts camping. Most fathers do not look forward to taking eight, nine-year-old kids camping.

Ms. Long’s husband had been killed in an automobile accident when her son Luther was a baby. She always pronounced his name Loothur; this provided the rest of us cubs with a great amount of pleasure, as we were prone to antagonizing each other to no end.
Ms. Long was one of those southern single women in her mid 30s who wanted a husband desperately but would never admit it. She did have a suitor, Mr. Tiddle.

Mr. Tiddle was a tall robust man. He was known locally as insane. He was prone to running up and down the dirt road in front of our house every morning, dressed in what appeared to be boxer shorts and a sleeveless shirt. Exercise was unheard of in the early 1970’s in rural Alabama, so we did not know what to make of this. But the craziest thing was that every January on the first day of the year he would put on his swimsuit and swim across the lake in the frigid waters of lake Snagley. He would recommend it as therapy for all the local farmers, most of which said if they ever ran low on misery they would give it a try. Mr. Tiddle also, as fate would have it, was the scoutmaster of the local Boy Scout troop.

We were sitting in Ms. Longs living room eating cookies and drinking cool-aid when Mr. Tiddle Burst in. He announced that he was inviting the local Cub Scout den to join the boy scouts in a campout that weekend. We all cheered and rushed Mr. Tiddle to express our gratitude.

That weekend we arrived at Ms. Longs house awaiting the arrival of Mr. Tiddle and the rest of the boy scouts. Shortly a pickup truck pulled up and out popped Mr. Tiddle. He loaded our packs into the truck and saluted us. Then he introduced us to two boy scouts. Their names escape me at the moment so I will refer to them as Attila and Adolph. He told us that we would be practicing our hiking skills the 6 miles up to Mount Snagley.

I raised my hand and said that i would be right back i had a piano lesson and could not miss it. Attila roared for me to get back in line there would be no Desertions.
There was a group moan. Attila and Adolph assumed their roll as marine drill instructors and began the battan death march out of town and up the mountain.

6 hours latter eight small blue clad cub scouts oozed into camp. Our tents were set up and a fire was going. We dug through out packs for our jackets, and huddled around the fire. I looked at Luther and asked are we camping yet. Luther began to plot our revenge for the forced march. Luther said whatever we do need to be simple but mean. He suggested stealing their clothes and making them run around naked and catch pneumonia so that they would die slowly. I said that sounded good but our chances of getting them out of their clothes was about the same as me walking back down that mountain in the morning.

Soon Mr. Tiddle set us up with some hot dogs to roast over the fire and we sang some songs and burned some marshmallows. Things were taking shape. I decided I would not go awol from the cub scouts after all.

Then Mr. Tiddle announced that he was going swimming in the creek.

TO be continued.

First Thank you for the birthday wishes

Contrary to what Chuck might say I turned 38 Saturday. Again I will say that Chuck lies.
My wife took the kids to the dollar store to get me presents. I got a flashlight, one of those long lighters for my grill, and a jar of peanuts.
I also had to spend the day working on a house I am trying to sell, and experienced the deep blue funk that I normally associate with growing older.
I know that all through history people, just like ourselves, who think as we do and act similar to the way we do, have grown older. Some embrace it and grow old gracefully. Some of us fight it tooth and nail. I find myself somewhere in between.
I do not like the thought of getting old. I was raised by old people I have been surrounded with old people my entire life. People 50+ years older than myself have taught me to fish and hunt. They have taught me much about life and have been instrumental in making me the person that I am. So they should have to shoulder much of the blame.

I hope to have some more birthdays. But, as I am finding out there are no guarantees. This statement is further evidence that I am still in my deep blue funk.
Another part of my funk is the fact that as I get older I receive fewer and fewer birthday cards. This year I received exactly 0. That’s right 0.
I understand that most folks figure that a man of 38 should be confident enough that this would not bother them, but it does. I realize also that I don’t have that many good friends.
Despite what you would believe from reading blogs, Chuck is one of my best friends but I have not seen him in months. So I also realize that I am not the best of friends either. And Chuck I don’t know when your birthday is either.

Oh well I will think for a while and try to come up with something funny or upbeat for tomorrow.
or maybe i will choose this time to start my midlife crisis.
Maybe i should look into that Lotus as a start .

tomorrow is my birthday
so tell me happy birthday so i wont get into a deep blue funk
Snagley

When I was a kid I worked at a feed and grain store. An old man worked their too his name was Slim. I never knew his real name everyone called him slim. He was about 6’4 and weighed around 125 pounds. He was the first “wino” I ever met. He was a nice enough guy if you could stand to smell him. He lived in a small house not far from the feed store. He bathed only on alternating leap years. The previous leap year had escaped his notice. I was young enough to ask him why he did not bathe; he said it kept the bugs off of him. Once he did not show up to help me unload a truck of grain. I found him by smell. He was under the feed store passed out. You could smell him inside the store.

Slim would show up for work about half drunk about once a week. The boss would drive him home in the back of his truck and put him in his house and check on him latter. I remember seeing him drunk the first time. He was staggering around and could not speak. I thought he was dying. I had never seed a drunken person before.

He had been married three times and ran each one of them off. He had a scar on his chin a reminder of his first wife; she went after him with a butcher knife when he came home drunk with another woman. I asked him why he did these things that were so foreign to me. He answered “for sport Bo for sport”. I guess he considered it his hobby.

I saw him the other day at another feed store where old men sit by a stove, drink coffee and eat roasted peanuts, and solve the world’s problems. He was in a rocking chair. It was 90 degrees outside and 100% humidity but he was covered up with a shawl to his waist. He recognized me and called me over. We talked about my life and my wife and kids. He kidded me about having it too good and having a little too much meat on my bones. I asked him were he lived now. He said he was living in the back of this store, on a cot. He said he was 92 years old now and he was doing the best he ever had.

He said he gave up liquor after wife number 4 shot him in the leg with a pistol. He said he had 12 children and 37 grandchildren and 12 great grand children buy the 4 wives. He said they all visited him last Friday on his birthday. He then spit tobacco juice on my boot. I asked him if he needed anything. He said no, he had no needs that were not taken care of by his grandson who owns the feed store.

I said I would come to this store more often now that I know he is there.

When I was 12 I worked with this man. He has had a hard life. His father was killed back in 1922 when he was a boy. He told me the story years ago. His father had stopped along the road as he walked back from the fields. He carried a bag of groceries for a white woman whose car had broken down. That evening that woman’s husband and some other men came and got Slim’s father and beat him. Slim’s father died a week latter. Slim was 9 years old. He went to work in the cotton fields the next day to help provide for his 4 younger brothers. He worked as a field hand beside grown men from that day forward. He has seen the civil rights movement at its worst, he marvels at how far it has come.

He is proud that his children have done better than he has; one of his grandkids is a doctor at UAB medical hospital. And, of course one owns the store his lives in. He has 3 grandkids in Iraq now two grandsons and a granddaughter, he is proud of their service. He takes no credit for their success other than as he said “and example of how not to do it”

I don’t have much of a point to this story, I just wrote it. Snagley out

Ok i got tagged by SK
i was suffering from writers block so this is something.

1. 10 years ago I was still a newlywed working 70+ hours per week as an air-conditioning repair man
2. 5 years ago I was enjoying my second sons birth
3. 1 year ago I was doing the same damn thing I am doing now.
4. 5 Snacks I enjoy…honey dew melon, cantaloupe, peaches, cookie dough, starburst jelly beans,
5. 5 songs I know all the words to. He went to Paris Jimmy Buffet, Happy Birthday, Blue Moon Billie Holliday, The Streak Ray Stephens, and Cherry Pie Warrant.
6. 5 locations I would run away to. Alaska, Fairhope Alabama, Dauphin Island Alabama, Edenton North Carolina, Waxhaw North Carolina.
7. 5 bad habits Procrastination, leaving the sink full of shaving cream, leaving my desk messy, Chuck abuse, eating all the fruit in the house.
8. 5 things I like doing fishing, working at home, playing with my kids, hunting, archery
9. 5 things I would never wear, Speedo, a dress, jewelry, women’s underwear, chucks hat.
10. 5 toys … Hoyt hypertec bow, work shop, building stuff, antique fishing tackle

What sort of posts would you like to see or read.

1. Stories from my life
2. Cat pictures
3. More stories from the snagley family tree.
4. Anything else that would interest anyone.

I went to a funeral today. I hate funerals they this woman suffered from diseases that caused both legs to be amputated. She suffered greatly and it is good that she will not suffer anymore. But, her daughter was sad. And her husband lost his first wife to the same ailment. Life is hard aint it.
Anyway I am posting by request tomorrow. what do you want.
Snagley out

What if

1. Deep impact was really an effort to divert a impact with earth
2. China is our next war “how old will your kids be”
3. Bacon, and egg sandwiches with mayo and cheese on toast cure cancer
4. The tobacco companies are right
5. Low carbohydrate diets cause impotence
6. We bought no more oil from the middle east
7. California fell into the ocean
8. Ted Kennedy was not an idiot
9. The John Belushi had not died
10. What if James Traficant is right
11. Gary Hart had no Monkey Business
12. Nixon had not got caught
13. Martin Luther King Jr. lived
14. The world trade center had not been destroyed by terrorist
15. Something else and thousands more had already been destroyed by terrorist
16. There were no mosquitoes
17. Bill Clinton had not had any scandals involving women
18. All cars used hog poop and corn for fuel
19. Prince Charles was king
20. Bill Gates feed a third world country for a year.
21. Ted Nugent was a vegetarian.
22. Donald Trump was not ego driven
23. Politicians were honestly doing what they thought was best for the country
24. Bo Snagley was president
25. Grace were based on actions

29 things I would buy if I could afford to I could not come up with 100
I was asked to do this so here it is. I really do have what I need and most of what I want. There are some things of course that I would buy if I could

1. I would build an outdoor store. I would sell fishing supplies and bait during the summer. I would have a kitchen that would cook breakfast and prepare sack lunches for the fisherman. I would have a fenced in lot that I would rent places for people to leave their boats that would be guarded when they are not using it. During the winter we would still sell the stuff for fisherman but also sell hunting supplies. And have an archery range as well. This has been my dream for a long time. I want this so that I can have a business where my children can work, and take over if they want to.
2. I would let my wife buy whatever clothes she wants to. She does without for the sake of our family. She never complains. I would let her buy whatever she wants.
3. I would build my kids a playhouse.
4. I would buy my parents a home of their own that is designed for old people.
5. I would take my parents on an Alaskan vacation.
6. I would buy an old pickup truck for my kids and me to rebuild and restore.
7. I would build my kids houses on my land for them when they grow up, if they want to live there.
8. I would buy a dozen archery targets and make an archery range for the boys.
9. A home schooling room for my kids
10. I would fence in my property so that we could raise cows or goats.
11. I would build an extension on my house so my boys could each have their own room.
12. A copier for my wife
13. A high output power inverter for my pickup truck so I could run electrical appliances off of the engine.
14. A deck on the back of my house.
15. A tent to take the boys camping
16. I would fix up my boat so that I could take the kids fishing
17. New carpet
18. I would take my kids on a beach vacation
19. I would buy a building for our cub/boy scouts
20. An old tractor to restore and use
21. A new pair of nice work boots
22. I would pay that guy that does extreme makeover home edition to redo our house.
23. A Lotus Elise I know that is crazy and impractical but hey it is a cool ride
24. A painting for my wife she has this really pretty one picked our for her kitchen
25. 4 registered boer goats three does and one buck
26. Central heat and air for my parents. They live in a small apartment next to my house and use window units.
27. Some arrows for my bow
28. A dump truck load of top soil
29. A bunch of fly tying supplies

the long awaited chick picture. The ones with the green marker on their heads are the male chicks the rest are female.