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Tuesday, November 22, 2005 

Chuck's Gate

Chucks gate

I wanted to document the events of the day so that they will be saved for posterity and as a record should any disagreements arise in the future regarding the incident of the gate.

First I arrive at 9:00 bright and early. I knock on he door, no answer. I then call Chucks cell phone, no answer. I can see his car in his driveway so I know he is there. I call his home phone. He answers.
Chuck Hello
Me Chuck, come open the dang door I am freezing out here.
Chuck Who is this?
Me Its me, Snagley come open the door.
Chuck Ok ok don’t get your knickers in a bunch.

Chuck then comes to the door wearing a pair of suit pants a white shirt tie and a matching suit vest. His manhood is hanging out the fly of his pants. He has a sizeable dip of snuff in his lip and is spitting the juice into an empty gallon orange juice jug. I am used to Chuck exposing himself so I choose to ignore him. He fixes me a cup of coffee and we discuss the day. At some point I become too disgusted to continue so I tell him to put that thing away it is making me sick
Chuck apologizes and puts his spit jug in the cabinet. I Said “ Dang it Chuck zip your pants”.
He looks down and acts surprised and zips his pants. Then without speaking he wanders off into the laundry room and pulls some clothes out of the hamper and gets dressed.
He is wearing a pair of Capri pants and a flannel shirt. I, of course, made him put on some other pants and we load up and go to Lowe’s to buy the supplies for the gate.

At Lowes, Chuck gets into an argument with the guy in the lumber department. He wants to buy a portion of lattice instead of a full sheet. We load up my truck and head back to Chuck’s house.
I unload the truck and start building the gate. Chuck disappears for about 10 minutes and returns with a chair and a box of double stuff Oreos. He is dipping his Oreos in milk and munching without even offering me one.

I finish the gate. Chuck begins complaining about how he has a splinter in his blogging finger and how it will hinder his computer use during his work hours. I offer to remove the splinter with my saw but he declines my generous offer.
Chuck now wants to take me to lunch. He has to change clothes again because he has milk and Oreo crumbs all over his shirt.

We go to ruby Tuesdays and I eat ribs. Chuck has a salad and some boneless buffalo wings. We drink a cold beer and call it a day.

Any other story is merely hearsay and should not be trusted.

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