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Monday, March 20, 2006 

College stories

My old buddy Chuck requested three posts.
The first request will take some time
So today I will concentrate on the second two.

I was on a flight with my wife to Kazakhstan in 1999 and we were in our seats relaxing in the Chicago airport when a young lady boarded the plane. She was a slender attractive woman carrying a large carry on bag. She was wearing a short dress and looking like a very professional woman. I noticed her only because she said I was in her seat. I explained to her that she had the seat across the isle from me. She turned around and picked up the huge carry on bag and lifted it above her head to stuff it into the overhead. I turned my head to glance her way when I noticed that her bare behind was staring me in the face. I spit water all over the floor and elbowed my wife. She looked over at her butt spilled Pepsi on my lap trying to laugh quietly without drawing attention to the bare bottomed woman. Evidently the woman was preparing to travel 13 hours one way to Frankfurt in a mini dress with no underwear. She not only mooned my wife and me, but also flashed her loins to the man already sitting in the window seat in her row. He seemed to appreciate the show greatly, as he probably did not receive this view from strange women in airplanes. When we arrived in Frankfurt as she started to reach for the overhead several people on the plane rushed to her assistance insisting that they, not her, retrieve her bag.

The Moral of this story, put on some drawers when you go out in public you might have to reach for a bag.

Story Two.
Chuck and I were sitting in our dorm room one Saturday night. The college we went to was small and what I call a suit case college. Everyone went home on the weekends. This made it profoundly boring for those of us stuck there. This also caused much chaos as we searched for stuff to break the monotony. I can’t remember the time but I said to Chuck, “lets go get some Southern Farms Mesquite B-BQ potato chips at the local Junior Foods Store. We went there and they were out. So one of us thought out loud lets go to the mall. The odd thing was that the mall was closed. We hopped into my 1971 metallic pea 4 door Chevy Nova and started that way. For some odd reason we decided to do so in our underwear. This was not our normal practice. It took us about an hour as we decided to go by the most populated route. When we arrived at the mall it was close to midnight. We did the only logical thing we could think of. We drove to the top of the parking deck and peed off the top. Then we drove back to the dorm.

You might ask why we did such a thing and was alcohol involved.

To answer the first question I honestly have no idea. We did a great number of things out of extreme boredom that have no rational explanation. We climbed water towers, buildings, A group of guys and I once covered our selves with shaving cream and sang frosty the snow man to all of the sororities on campus, i did a number of very stupid things that have no logical explination.

The second question no alcohol was involved.