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Tuesday, April 26, 2005 

I could be batman I guess or Snagley to the rescue

Last night I saw a wrecked car on the side of the road. You could tell that it had not been there long. I pulled my truck over and ran to the car. There was a guy sort of crumpled up under where the glove compartment should have been. Our conversation is as follows

Me: Hey Buddy how are you.

Victim: Been better.

Me: Looks like you had an accident.

Victim: Ya think

Me: Pretty sure. Say fella what is your name.

Victim: Carl

Me: Nice to meet you Carl

Carl: Pleased to meet you, whoever you are.

Me: I am sorry where are my manners,, just call me Snagley

Carl: I will do that Snagley…I don’t suppose you have a mobile phone do you.

Me: Yes I do.

Carl: Would you mind calling 911 for me please I think I may need some medical attention

Me: Woops, I guess that would be the thing to do,, (I call 911 and give them directions)
Hey Carl I called 911 help is on the way.

Carl: Thanks

Me: Hey its cold out here you might catch cold I will get you the blanket out of my car don’t want you catching cold.

Carl: Big deal

Me: (after getting blanket) let me tuck this in for you is that good. (only his head is showing)

Carl: I guess

Me: (thinking he may be going into shock I decide to try some light conversation to keep him awake)
Me: Some weather we are having (rain is falling)

Carl: Yeah great, Rain in the ear, I cant get enough of it.

Me: I am building a chicken coop in my back yard. The Wife and I almost finished it yesterday.

Carl: What !?!?

Me: I am building a chicken coop in my back yard. I plan to let my kids sell eggs.

Carl: Listen Snagley I don’t really feel up to light conversation.

Me: Just trying to help.

Uncomfortable pause in the conversation

Me: I guess I could put my raincoat over the hole in the windshield and keep the rain out of your ear.

Carl: Whatever

Me: (I take off my raincoat and realize that it will not fit over the windshield)
Carl I think I will have to cover you with the raincoat it will not fit over the windshield.

Carl: Whatever

Me: (as the fire and rescue drive up I am leaning through the window of the wrecked car with my legs hanging out, thoughtfully placing my only raincoat over Carl in an effort to save him from an nasty case of swimmers ear.)

Fireman: Looks like we got here just in time (a crowd gathers) Look he was almost thrown from the car. Take it easy fellow. I am pulled from the car

Me: He put me down. I am ok

Fireman: Take it easy guy looks like your face took a nasty hit on the windshield.

Me: What are you talking about nothing is wrong with my face mmfff mmrrgg (an oxygen mask is stuffed over my mouth)

Carl: Aagufasdf (He is unheard over the noise of the fire trucks and also being under a blanket and my good and only raincoat.)

Me: Scramble scramble as I slip away into the night to my pickup truck and escape as all good Samaritans should, not asking for any thanks.

I saw on the news last night that Carl was finally found by the guy un hooking the wrecker at the salvage yard an hour latter. He was treated for a broken thumb and high blood pressure.
On TV he was seen leaving the hospital wearing my good raincoat. He said he would like to meet the man who stopped and spoke to him. He said he thought the name was Snabbely. I assume to return my raincoat. I think it would be best if I remain anonymous.

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