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Thursday, September 29, 2005 

Yesterday I was out feeding the chickens when the guy next door came riding over with his kid on horses. My kids went crazy wanting to see the horses. So the guy invited them to come over to his barn and ride the horses. My wife and the boys were really excited so we hopped in to the minivan and headed over.

We put Boy number 2 onto an old horse that sort of plodded along. #2 was ecstatic he is 5 and went around making up songs about his horse riding exploits. My wife and boy number 1 loaded up on a younger more able horse and quietly walked around the pasture. I took #2 on a long walk leading the horse. I looked up and the wife and #1 were on the horse and it was running. It took a turn and both fell off. I walked the horse with #2 back to the barn to see my wife lying on her back not moving. When I got to her she was incoherent Boy1 was fine a little scraped up but ok.

Jo could not stand she had a bump the size of a golf ball on her head was bleeding from her right arm and her right shin. I got her loaded up and took her to the hospital.

At the hospital there was no wheelchair at the door. I had to go in and ask for one and wait 11 minutes. (I have a stopwatch on my watch). They get us into a room and this old woman who seemed to be a 63-year-old candy striper said they were short handed and she was helping out. Nurses seem to be of two types. The ones who are stoic and emotionless and come in do their job and walk out. And then there are the ones who are way to happy and talkative. They come in talking baby talk to my 32 year old wife and tell me that they have to take my wife’s pants off and could I give her some privacy. Jo said “he has seen me give birth to 3 kids and was present for all three conceptions so privacy is not much of an issue to her”.

The x-ray techs accidentally pulled her off the bed and made her cry. I have always made it a policy of mine to freak out when my wife is already hurt and then is pulled off of a bed by x-ray techs, so I then went a little nuts and ended up with the president of hospital administration coming down and assuring me that this would not happen again yada yada yada, and could he please kiss my rosy red rectum.

They did give her a beautiful pain shot that had her giggling hysterically in the lobby as I paid my co-payment.

Luckily she ended up with only a badly sprained ankle. She is profoundly sore this morning and cannot get out of the bed without assistance from all the bruising. Its always something.