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Wednesday, April 25, 2007 

chickens, drawers, baseball and too tight pants.

I got up really early this morning to feed chickens and survey my domain. I did so in my underwear and rubber boots as is my practice. This particular morning, I was greeted by the neighbor lady wanting to buy some eggs. She commented that she liked my boxer briefs. She bought 18 eggs and was on her way. What is this world coming to when you cant feed the chickens in your drawers? I may need to think about moving further out into the country.

In other news, The company I work for took us all to a minor league baseball game last week. Part of the deal was that some representative from the company had to throw out the first pitch. As you would guess, Bo Snagley drew the short straw, and threw that sucker out.

I had to go to the souvenir stand and they took me to the underside of the park. There I met the other 6 people who would throw out first pitches. There was some kid having his 10th birthday, me, some girl who was wearing pants that were way too tight, giving us all a glimpse into a world that would be better left unknown, a 6 year old cancer survivor and three other boys who played baseball for Dixie youth.

The major danger of throwing out the first pitch for an adult is not making it to the catcher. The 10 year old did just fine. I managed a fine wind up and threw a soft strike. The girl in the too tight pants threw it high and tight. The cancer survivor made it about 4 feet but the stands went wild, as they should. The other three kids tried to break the fingers of the catcher.

I did not take much out of this experience other than the cancer survivor should have been up there by her self. The 10 year old should have been in the stands with a new hat and cake on his face. The girl in the too tight pants should put on some underpants quickly, Ladies please if you wear pants that are too low and too tight, I personally don’t want to see either panties or butt crack or any other creases or crevices, try out for the pussycat dolls instead. The other three kids should have been in the bullpen. And lastly, Bo Snagley should have had a cool beer and a side of nachos.

Snagley out