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Wednesday, March 23, 2005 

Boesely

OK this one is true…... Really

When I was a kid I was in the Boy Scouts. I am now involved with my sons Cub Scout pack. When I was a scout we camped all the time. One of my favorite overnight trips was to a local state park Oak Mountain State Park. This was a long time ago when they let you backpack up into the mountains and spend the night. Now they rope you off to a small section that looks like a pasture. This story is about a dufas named Boesely, and his ineptitude at life in general.

Boesely was a skinny kid but tall for his age. He weighed less than 100 pounds and was at least 5’10” tall. He loved camping, but for the life of my I don’t know why. He always came home in much worse shape that when he left. He always ended up dirty and bleeding or chaffed.

On this particular trip we were going to backpack 4 miles up to Shackelford Gap and spend some time poking sticks in the fire, and telling stories, and cooking enough food for two dozen college students home for a weekend of serious eating. Boesely loved to fill his pack with miscellaneous B.S.. His pack must have weighed 140 pounds if it weighed an ounce.
He had included in his backpack
Extra pair of pants
Extra shirt
Extra pair of underwear
Extra pair of socks
Extra handkerchief
Toothbrush
Toothpaste
Soap
Deodorant
Washcloth
Towel
Air mattress
2 gallons of water
Axe
Machete
Pots
Pans
Etc. Etc. Etc
For a kid of 13 years this is a lot of useless B.S. no one changes clothes no one brushes their teeth or bathes. I don’t know what he was thinking with deodorant, the Scout Master used to say that he could find a scout lost in the woods with his eyes closed as long as his nose was working. He never used this stuff but it fulfilled an important function for him, it filled every pocket and compartment in his backpack.

His back would begin to sag the moment he put this pack on. After the first half-mile his feet would blister, his loins would be chaffed beyond function, and he would begin a moan that would shake the pine straw off the trees. Shut up Boesely we would say sympathetically.

We finally got to the campsite on the top of the mountain. Boesely setup his tent and inflate his air mattress and setup camp. He set his tent in a small drainage this is rule #1 do not setup your tent in a drainage area. We started playing capture the flag and general having a good time.

It began to rain that night hard. Boesely got into his tent and slept, the boy could sleep through a explosion at a hand grenade factory. Anyway the next morning he was nowhere to be found. The dufas had floated out of his tent and down the drainage about 30 yards away and was still asleep.

Ok no great punch line but I met up with this guy last night and we laughed about this. I told him I would write a story about it. HERE IT IS.

Snagley Out

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