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Friday, January 14, 2005 

Why am i named Bonapart.
My mothers favorite Aunt Maudie had an affair with a man named Bonapart Lasias. He was a door to door salesman, who prefered the company of shall we say portly women. Maudie dressed out at around 314 pounds and was 5 foot 2 inches tall so she fit his requirements. Bonapart was Maudies first and only true love. They fell deeply in love. Bonapart gave Maudie some good times, and three venerial deseases, then Bonapart was called into service in Vietnam, became an officer and was shot by his own men (that is another story). Maudie was devistated and because they never married she had no claim to any military pension. Maudie went into a deep depression went to bed and refused to eat. 3 months and 204 punds latter, Maudie emerged from bed as a real looker, she went on beach vacation to get some sun, went into the water and was eaten by a shark.

Mom had every intention of naming me Maudie but I turned out to be a boy so she named me Bonapart after Maudie's lover.